Happy Birthday, Mikayla (22)
By Jen Lewis
It's miserable and magical (oh yeahhhhh)
(Guess what music Jen has on in the background right now)
Golly gee willickers, can you BELIEVE IT. A whole year has gone by since our magical trip to Portland (click all three of those links right now), and you are once again in Portland, while I sit in my home by myself crying because my beautiful sisters are together and I want to be with you SO MUCH.
But I promised you in your birthday card (which you will likely not get until Monday, because even though it's been in my house for a week, I didn't get your present shipped out until Wednesday) that this would NOT be a sad, mopey Jen blog post, this would be a happy, MIKAYLA JUST TURNED 22 blog post.
Ya know, one of those!
But first, a look back at all the fandoms (and birthdays) (and boys) we've loved before...
Mikayla turns sixteen (Studio Ghibli) • Mikayla turns seventeen (Psych) • Mikayla turns eighteen (Avengers) • Mikayla turns nineteen (Siblings) • Mikayla turns twenty (SNL) • Mikayla turns twenty-one (Alcohol)
Jen turns twenty (BBC) • Jen turns twenty-one (Community) • Jen turns twenty-two (Taylor Swift) • Jen turns twenty-three (Bob's Burgers) • Jen turns twenty-four (X-Files) • Jen turns twenty-five (Firefly)
I have to mute Taylor for a second, while I think about this. You still have not taken the plunge into Bojack Horseman, which hurts me a little bit. And Big Mouth, but frankly there wouldn't be a single thing in Big Mouth I could pull out in GIF form and feel comfortable about mom reading later, so that's for the best. It would be pretty easy to do an Avengers reboot, because the amount of Marvel movies that has come out in the last four years is INSANE. I still haven't dipped into Sailor Moon, so it would feel almost like a lie to try to pull something together for that. Rick and Morty is more mine than yours (yes, I AM claiming ownership), so I don't feel right about that one...
So I guess I just have one thing to say: THANK GOD I JUST BINGED THE HELLLLL OUTTA GRAVITY FALLS.
I un-muted YouTube, and it had moved on to 'You Belong With Me,' which is accurate, you do belong with me, but instead you're in Portland, having a grand old time going to a concert of a band that I don't remember the name of, but that's fine, I'm fine, everything is fine. I've got music I can listen to, just no sisters to listen to it with.
REALLY IT'S FINE. I'm so stoked for you guys. And I'm so excited to see what you get up to this year. I mean, you KILLED year 21. You went to Ireland, you visited me twice (THREE TIMES? WAS IT THREE TIMES? YOU ARE SO GOOD TO ME), you moved up at your job, you moved into the Pumpkin House, you started drinking and cussing (haha just kidding, mom), like I could not even be any prouder of you.
So during your 22nd year, I expect that you will be moving to Mendocino County, spending your days in that nice stump we saw on the Rail Bikes, conversing with the foxes and the ravens, and living off the land.
But for real, if there's one thing you'll continue to do, it'll be to make life a more magical experience for everyone you come into contact with. Everyone who's met you, and I am NOT exaggerating here, knows how fuckin cool of a human you are. You exude joy and positivity and love and happiness. Don't let it overwhelm you, but KNOWWWWWW that you are loved. So loved.
Whatever decisions you make this year, I want to know about them. It hurts being so far away, and I want to know all the things happening in your life. I need regular video chats, I need postcards, I need music recommendations, I need memes, I need another 126 days in a row of snapchatting each other. I realize this is YOUR birthday, and I am the one asking for all the things, so let me fix that. I will STALK YOU UNTIL YOU TALK TO ME CONSTANTLY. Can you stop working and dedicate your life to texting me? That would be great.
Happy birthday. If you don't video chat me at some point while you're in Portland, I will actually die.
I don't know if you're the pig or Dipper in this blog post, but it doesn't matter.
I can't believe you're 22. You are catching up with me, and while YOU are not getting old, I definitely feel like I am. Another three years for you, and we can start saying you're getting older. For now, this gif is strictly for me.
Okay, now I have one thing you have to do today, and that's click this link and look through all of our photos together and cry a little bit. That's all!
(But also you should go back and read all of our old birthday blog posts from the past six years. Wow, we're annoying! I love us!!)